Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
From my Email Inbox: A Funny...
A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.
The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent."
We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved, and he yelled back that Ted Kennedy is a fat good-for-nothing, left wing liberal drunk who doesn't know how to drive.
So I said that Osama Ben Ladin dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian!
He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does Hillary Clinton!"
"And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."
The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent."
We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved, and he yelled back that Ted Kennedy is a fat good-for-nothing, left wing liberal drunk who doesn't know how to drive.
So I said that Osama Ben Ladin dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian!
He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does Hillary Clinton!"
"And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Murphy's Law
Life is not fair. Let's say that you go to the coast, it inevitably rains. But at home the weather improves. You return home, and it rains at home, but the weather at the coast clears up. Frustrated, you go to the store to buy an umbrella because of the damn rain. You notice the person behind you in line at the checkout only came in to buy a pack of gum, so you let them go ahead of you in line and they win a $1000 gift card for being the umpteenth customer, and they are excited to win the card, but do not even bother to turn and thank you. Go figure. I think some of us are all related to Mr. Murphy.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Another joke from a bad, bad man.
A lovely joke sent by my roomie Bergie again.
Fwd : How many animals can you fit in a pair of panty hose? 2 calves, an ass, a beaver, a shit load of hares, 1 camel toe & a dead fish nobody can find!
Someone help me, Please! (I hear it was sent to him by one of my nieces!)
Fwd : How many animals can you fit in a pair of panty hose? 2 calves, an ass, a beaver, a shit load of hares, 1 camel toe & a dead fish nobody can find!
Someone help me, Please! (I hear it was sent to him by one of my nieces!)
A Bad Joke From A Bad Man.
My roomie just read a joke to me. From the Playboy archives: What do you call a man with a 1 inch penis? Justin.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Perhaps one good thing will come out of Twitter..... A medical record.
Okay, this tweet finds me in atrial fibrulation. Uncomfortable in chest, sweating. Sucks. Anyway, still testing Twitter.
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